Rescue, shmescue, as the loathsome Jews would say

By: PDCC

by

This Editor’s Note was sent out earlier Wednesday in ToI’s weekly update email to members of the Times of Israel Community. To receive these Editor’s Notes as they’re released, join the ToI Community here.

Wait a minute. This can’t be right.

The brutal Jewish state, deep into its genocidal assault on the Palestinians of Gaza, diverts hundreds of its murderous special forces into valiant Hamas’s underground network to save a middle-aged Muslim man?

Surely some mistake. Muslims from the River to the Sea must be liberated from Israel. Isn’t that our slogan? Israel doesn’t do the liberating…

Wait, there’s more. The extricated Muslim, a Bedouin father of 11 named Farhan al-Qadi, had been abducted by mighty Hamas on October 7? That can’t be true. Why would Hamas — champion of the Islamic cause — abduct gentle, Godfearing Muslims? Sure, we all know Israel claims that Hamas killed and abducted numerous Muslims on October 7, but that was just Zionist propaganda, directed against the heroic fighters… Wasn’t it?

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Hostage Farhan al-Qadi meets with the commander of the 162nd Division, Brig. Gen. Itzik Cohen, moments after being rescued from a tunnel in the southern Gaza Strip, August 27, 2024. (Israel Defense Forces)

I’m sorry, al-Qadi was working that day at an illegal Israeli kibbutz settlement? All right. I understand. Our brothers have to feed their families.

As a security guard at a Zionist packing plant? The vicious, Arab-hating Jews trusted and paid a Muslim to protect them? No, that just can’t be right…

Wait, now he’s being reunited with his family at a Zionist hospital, filled with, what, Jewish and Muslim doctors and nurses, treating Jewish and Muslim patients?

No, no, no! This cannot be true. This is fake news. Fake footage. Fake family. Fake Farhan.

Okay, now those evil and sophisticated propagandists have really overdone it. They’re claiming he’s on the phone with the Zionist murderer-in-chief. As if Nosferatu Netanyahu would phone a Muslim and hail his safe return from the beloved clasp of our Hamas brethren.


Rescued hostage Farhan al-Qadi speaks to Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu at Beersheba’s Soroka Hospital on August 27, 2024 (Courtesy Yossi Ifergan)

Have to say it’s Hollywood quality… Well, of course it is. Here’s Farhan sitting up in his hospital bed, smiling broadly into the phone, purportedly greeting the prime minister. In Arabic, no less! “Ahlan wa Sahlan.” Calling him “Abu Yair”! Yeah, right, like that happened.

They’re telling each other how happy they are to be speaking. Fake Netanyahu is assuring Fake Farhan that he was never forgotten; Fake Farhan is thanking him for the “holy work” that Israel has done to rescue him. Forgery. Fiction. Fabrication.


Farhan al-Qadi speaks to Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu at Beersheba’s Soroka Hospital on August 27, 2024 (Courtesy Yossi Ifergan)

Now we’ve totally gone off the deep end. Fake Farhan, no longer smiling, in fact looking distraught, is daring to politely challenge the Zionist dictator by reminding him that “there are other people who are waiting” to be rescued from the protective embrace of our glorious Hamas. And Netanyahu is patiently responding that “we are committed to getting everybody back, without exception.” If this wasn’t all fakery, you can be sure Netanyahu would be sending his goons into the ward right now to silence pesky Farhan once and for all.

Oh, hang on a minute. Phew. Panic over!

I’ve finally been told the true story of what happened. It’s on ultra-reliable social media. Hamas abducted Farhan by mistake! Yeeessss! And as soon as they realized their error, in their magnificence, they set him free. Right on!!

Rescue, shmescue, as the loathsome Jews would say.

He was deliberately placed, with loving care, in a tunnel our conquering saviors knew the hideous Zionists would find, so that he could be brought safely home.

But hold on a second. That doesn’t make any sense. Farhan speaks Arabic. Our warriors would have known from the start that he was one of ours, not one of theirs — and that was 326 days ago.

And that still doesn’t explain why the murderous Zionists hurried him back to his family rather than disposing of him with their customary disregard.

And it would mean that the hospital footage isn’t fake? Which would mean that Israel really did want to save him? And that the prime minister really did call him? And that, in Israel, an Arab can gently chide the prime minister? And that Arabs get treated in hospitals by Jewish doctors?

And that, heaven forbid, Hamas is lying? And not very nice — not even to Muslims?

I don’t know what to believe anymore…

You know what, I don’t care.

To hell with Netanyahu, the Zionists, and their stooges like Farhan al-Qadi.

All together now: From the River to the Sea, Palestine will be free. We’ll show you how to do genocide, for real.

pdcc

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